1914-01-05 Khan Book review

In his column in the Hamilton Herald, mailed in from his home just outside of Rockton, the Khan occasionally wrote book reviews and commented on political issues of the day. 

Following is a book review that deals with the international arms race, Canada's contribution to that and the shadow of war which lingered at the edge of consciousness among many people as the year 1914 began.

“Chronicles by the Khan”

Herald  January 5, 1914

“CANADA AND SEA POWER”

        The public has not got the right reason why the naval contribution hangs fire. Most folk think that in some subtle way politics has to do with it. Those who have preached and written against war and exposed the folly of it during the past fifty years in this land are coming into their own. The trees of life which they planted are beginning to fruit. Their branches are beginning to interlock and they are smothering the nettles and the briers and the poison ivy which grow below.

        There hath arisen a king who knows not Joseph. That’s the brutal truth. A king who fails to see why his people should build useless battleships either on shares or for hire. A generation hath arisen to which the very idea of war is repugnant. Now is their chance to get it into the schools. You’ve heard of the little old red schoolhouse? Very well : the only reforms in this country that ever amounted to anything began there.

        I know of no better text book for the common schools than “Canada and Sea Power” by Christopher Wren. This is his pen name. His right name is E. B. Biggar, of the noted family of that ilk, and he was born at Winona, a district which has furnished more than its share of brilliant and useful men and women to our national life. The book is in the best English, and is made luminous by a beautiful enthusiasm.

        Mr. Biggar considers his subject from three aspects : first, the economic or industrial; second, the political or international; and third, the moral and spiritual. Much that he says has been said before by Norman Angell and the noble host of peace evangels in the old days before him. But Mr. Biggar puts it freshly, sometimes, quaintly, but always convincingly. Here is a quotation taken at random :

        “The situation between Canada and Great Britain may be likened to a daughter and mother. If you, a daughter, find that your mother has yielded to the appetite for drink and has become a dissolute woman, are you going to mend matters by joining carousals and becoming a drunkard too ? Would not this double the woes of the family and curse the neighborhood with two drunkards instead of one? Yes; but you reply that no matter how besotted your mother has become, are you to stand by and see her assaulted and beaten? That question may be raised when the assault is made, or afterwards, but not before.”

        In this last sentence, Mr. Biggar unconsciously gives the whole argument for the $35,000,000 naval contribution. If war should break out – should, mark you – and Canada had failed to furnish either ships or money, and the motherland was beaten, it would be altogether too late to consider the question.

        Canadian literature is not made up wholly of our annual crop of Christmas poetry books, good, bad and indifferent. There be Canadians who write well on all the great questions of the day, but few of them are in the same class as the author of “Canada As a Sea Power” a book worth reading.

1914-Jan 5 GarbageVultures

“His voice at times trembling with intensity and emotion, evidencing that he spoke sincerely, Rev. S. Banks Nelson, D. D. last night went after newspapers and newspapermen from the pulpit of Know Presbyterian Church”¹

Hamilton Daily Times. January 5, 1914.

The sermon advertised to be delivered at the evening services was titled “A Forecast of 1914.” The minister of Knox Presbyterian Church never disappointed a congregation seeking sensationalism, and despite the terse sermon title, Rev. Dr. Nelson did not fail to deliver.

A reporter for the Hamilton Times who, along with many others who were not members of that church, attended in the hopes of hearing something remarkable. He did, calling the sermon a “tirade of abuse  - for it was little short of that , and was of a nature that could hardly be called fair criticism.”¹

¹ “Called Reporters Garbage Vultures : Dr. Nelson’s Choice Talk at Knox : World Better In spite of Newspapers”

Hamilton Times. January 5, 1914.

Rev. Dr. Nelson’s sermon for the start of the new year of 1914 began with a strong emphasis on the necessity of determination to make a success of any enterprise and lauded all those prepared to turn over a new leaf.

Success, the “local divine” (the Times reporter’s label), did not come as a result of good luck, but as a result of persistence and that every effort would be rewarded with due deserts :

        “The great difficulty in the world was that people had gone silly over chance, and games of chance, with the result that they introduced it in everything that occurred.

        “ ‘The world has gone silly over chance as American people have over that silly game of cards. It is spreading to Canada, and I know that people play cards on Sunday in Hamilton. Stop talking about the world being lucky. First give up cards. Nothing particular wrong with cards, anymore than there is with checkers. It is all in the hand you get, the skill is in the dealing of the pack. Stop playing a silly chance of chance such as cards and get chance out of your mind. He that seweth, reapeth, and there is no luck about it.’

        “Delving a few moments in poetry, Rev. Dr. Nelson quoted, ‘Something attempted, something done, has earned a night’s repose.’ Then burlesquing it, ‘Something tricky, something done, has earned nervous prostration.’ ”¹

            Rev. Dr. Nelson then advanced another theme he was passionate about, namely that the world was generally getting better despite the way the general negative attitude that newspapers took:

        “ ‘Don’t tell me the world is not getting better, Mr. Newspaper Reporter – you garbage vulture,’ shouted Mr. Nelson loud enough to be heard on the street. ‘Don’t tell me the world is not improving, for I know better. If I want to find out what conditions do not exist, I look in the newspapers.’ A laugh provoked Dr. Nelson to continue : ‘We never find in the papers accounts of marriages from love. Lots of society marriages that may or not be love. But the papers will not publish the others. Why, only one marriage that I have officiated at in Hamilton have I seen in the newspaper.”¹

            Dr. Nelson then declared that it was a sin that Hamilton did not have a morning paper :

        “Dr. Nelson did not advance any particular reason why there should be one, except that he wanted to read one each morning, and he is also seemed quite peeved that the local evening papers did not establish morning sheets.

        “ ‘I read the Toronto Globe every morning,’ declared the speaker, ‘ and I find a column headed Hamilton Intelligence. That shows that there is a lack of intelligence here. Why don’t Hamilton newspapermen get busy, and get a morning paper of our own? The idea of a city the size of Hamilton without a morning paper! I want one in the morning because I have more time to read it then than in the evening.’

        “Dr. Nelson closed with the declaration that the pillars of the world, Truth, Courage and Love, would prevail all through 1914, and the world would continue to get better, despite the newspapers.”¹

            Newspapermen generally show no hesitation to respond to challenges, especially if matters of journalistic integrity are involved.

        Such was the case with the editor of the Hamilton Times who wrote the following editorial (quoted in full) under the headline “Garbage Vultures” :

        “There is such a thing as yellow journalism. Is there such a thing as yellow preaching? Over in the United States sensational journalism has become a marked feature of the newspaper press. But as time has repeatedly shown that, in the long run, yellow journalism does not always pay, this sort of newspaper work has not spread of late.

        “And we are pleased to think that even in the States, the newspaper world is dominated by many newspapers of high standing whose influence is for good. We could name many influential newspapers over there which take a prominent part in the work of bettering the world, both socially and morally, newspapers which spend money lavishly for the public good.

        “In Canada, there may be one or two unifluential newspapers which may try to live on literary carrion, but otherwise, the whole press of Canada strives to be as clean and wholesome as the pulpit itself.

        “We do not know where the Rev. Dr. Nelson, of Knox Church, got his idea of newspaper reporters, so that he was moved last evening to brand them as ‘garbage vultures.’ Certainly, he could not characterize the young men who act as reporters for the local press as such.

        “It is a weakness of human nature for the layman to imagine that he could run a newspaper better than can those engaged in that occupation, and many people believe that they could report a meeting or an incident better than can the average newspaper reporter.

        “But newspaper work is like everything else. It requires an apprenticeship, an education, judgment and a ‘nose for news’ to make a successful reporter. In ‘holding the mirror up to nature,’ the reporter has often to deal with unsavory subjects, and in reciting the details of some foul crime, he has often to lay bare moral sores that require strong language. If the reverend gentleman was in earnest when he so heartlessly besmirched the good name of a lot of decent fellows, he owes them an apology.

        “If the newspapers are carriers and disseminators of garbage, why is Dr. Nelson so anxious to read one every morning? We would imagine that he would put it from him as an unholy thing, instead of wasting time that might be devoted to the service of his Master.

        “Were Knox Church people really needing to be told in last night’s sermon that the preacher wanted a morning paper established in Hamilton? Was that what they went to church to hear?

        “A story is told that a stranger once went to hear the former Bishop of London preach. When afterwards asked what he thought of the sermon, he replied : ‘I went to hear of the way to heaven, but instead I was told of the way to Palestine.’ ” ¹

The Hamilton Spectator’s final word on the matter, in an editorial:

        “The average reporter perhaps thinks it is tough enough luck to be sent to listen to a sermon by the present pastor of Knox church. Imagine his feelings, then, when he is awakened from his doze in the comfortable pew by hearing himself denounced as a ‘garbage vulture.’ Talk about adding insult to injury! It really might affect an ordinary individual, but the newspaperman receives more buffets than rewards from fortune’s hands. Does the pastor place his own sermons among the filth the reporter preys on? Or is it only when they are defiled by the reporter’s touch that they become ‘garbage’? Or is it possible that even the loathsome hand of a reporter can’t spoil them? We give it up. Somebody seems to be in need of a lot of sympathy, and, after careful inquiry in the ranks of the reporters, the congregation can have first claim.”¹

1914 Jan. 2 Noodles Fagan (Part 3)

“In a week made memorable for Hamilton newsboys , there has been no feature which quite equaled the performance given by the newsies themselves at the Lyric last night. From the first to last the youngsters enjoyed themselves to the full, and in proof thereof they cheered to the echo everything and everybody – including themselves.”

Hamilton Spectator.  January 3, 1914¹

Noodles Fagan, sponsored by the Hamilton Spectator, had entertained a huge number of Hamilton newsboys, with members of the families, at the Lyric on the morning of January 1, 1914.

Noodles was a vaudeville performer, as well as the celebrated “King of the Newsies” and he was part of a long list of performers engaged to appear at Hamilton’s Lyric Theatre during the first part of January 1914.

For the bill at the Lyric on January 2, 1914, there was a special addition to the bill.

The Spectator had acquired a large block of tickets in the balcony of the theatre and had invited for the newsboys employed specifically by the Spectator to attend that evening’s entertainment.

The Spectator had called for its newsboys to gather in front of the newspaper’s office on James Street South at 7:30 p.m. but the boys began to arrive there fully an hour before :

“By the time it was half-past seven o’clock, the boys were blocking James street, and making more noise than when Home-run Baker walloped the ball over the fence and won the first game for Connie Mack’s hired men.

“Then ‘King Noodles the First’ – otherwise ‘Noodles’ Fagan, uncrowned king of the newsboys and headliner at the Lyric this week – arrived on the scene and marshalled the boys into some kind of shape. Before a start could be made, however, cheers had to be given for the Spectator and then more cheers for Noodles, their friend, mentor and guide.”¹

¹ “Newsboys’ Funfest as Guests of Spectator : Theatre Rafters Ring With Shouts of Glee : King Noodles Leads Grand Parade to Lyric.”

Hamilton Spectator. January 3, 1914.

It was a scene to remember as 500 newsboys, with King Noddles leading them, paraded down King street to the Mary street theatre. Although quite noisy during the march, the boys entered the theatre, proceeded to the balcony in an orderly fashion, and, for the most part, behaved themselves during the show :

“But it was their night, and they meant to enjoy it to the utmost. Weren’t they there as guests of the Spectator, and wasn’t their friend ‘Noodles’ going to come out on the stage shortly all dressed up like a regular feller? Sure, sure, both times. Well they should smoke an onion – oh! that’s right, Noodles said they musn’t smoke”¹

The newsboys politely applauded the other performers on the bill, although perhaps occasionally at the wrong time, but there was one performer that they were waiting for :

“For Noodles, of course, the boys had a big reception. They joined in the chorus of his songs and laughed gleefully at his sallies. He understands newsboys, Noodles does, having been one himself, and their admiration for him is unbounded. So was their applause, and they almost lifted the roof off with their plaudits at the conclusion of his act.”¹

After the end of the scheduled performances on the bill, there was a special treat – the performance, on stage, of the newsboys themselves :

“For most of them, it was their first appearance as ‘regular actors’ upon any stage, but it takes more than that to frighten a newsboy. Noodles had charge of this part of the program, and at his request the boys swarmed out of the balcony and upon the stage.”¹

Only 100 of the 500 newsboys at the Lyric actually went on stage, but those who didn’t shouted encouragement to those who did, and fully enjoyed what ensued, “ a series of ‘contests’ peculiar to newsies – games which only the inventive genius of quick-witted boys who sell papers for a living could imagine.”¹

With Noodles introducing each game in his usually enthusiastic, humorous way, the newsboys’ portion of the evening began with a boxing match, a boxing match with a difference as both boy combatants stood in wooden barrels.

The next contest involved a line of six boys who were required to eat two crackers each and then attempt to whistle. The contestants were convulsed with giggles and unable to produce any sort of whistling sound with the exception of the littlest chap, not over three feet six inches high, who was able to emit a faint, very faint, whistle. The little guy was declared winner.

The next event was a yelling contest in two sections. First up were boys over fourteen years who were directly in turn to yell at the top of their voices the following “The Hamilton Spectator, all about the big Fire!” :

“The winner of this was a big fellow with a roar which sounded very much like the report of a twelve-inch gun. If at short range he shouted at a prospective customer like that the probabilities are that he would scare a man to death before he could sell a paper.

“There was also a yelling contest for boys under twelve years ago age, in which the palm was awarded to a boy who unwittingly substituted the word ‘suicide’ for ‘fire.’ The laughter which followed sounded very much like a miniature gale and fairly rocked the house.”¹

The next contest involved the consumption of a mixture of bread and water which one boys had to feed another boy by spoon. Another contest involving food consisted of wieners attached to a wooden bar. The boys, with their hands behind their backs had to try and eat one of the wieners. The contest was made more challenging as Noodle gently moved the bar to and fro.”

The last contest was perhaps the funniest of all. A huge pile of white flour, placed in a big container, contained a paper bag filled with prizes. The boys, again holding their hands behind their backs, could only look for the hidden prize by going into the pile face first.

As described by the Spectator reporter who obviously enjoyed this assignment, it was an evening to remember:

“For each of these various games, ‘Noodles’ had a different name, such as monkadoo, spiddo ump. Gluck, wobbling etc., but while the boys cared little what the games were called, it is safe to say that memory of ‘Noodles’ and the carnival provided for them last night will not be forgotten by them in many a day.”¹